This article was written for those girls and women who come to consult a psychologist with the following question: "What do I do with him, we encounter so much time (or - we live together), but it does not make me an offer!"
Decide
First of all, consider whether or not to bind your life with this particular man. Quite often girls and women in choosing a partner from the point of view: "It happened, and do not take into account the fact that this is a very important step. Help you determine such a simple procedure.
Take a sheet of paper and write a list: "What are the qualities I want in my husband? (Basic 10-15 points).
Then for each item check "plus" or "minus" all the qualities they are present in this man or not.
If the pros will be 80% or higher, then this is the man.
If less - then the game is not worth the candle, you are to him sooner or later will become cold, it will not suit you, and the relationships still fall apart. In this case, it is better to let him go now and go out and find someone who will match the ideal.
Remove emotional dependence on men
Its symptoms are as follows: "I can not leave him, I can not get along without him, I suffer from his love." Your condition must be: "If these relations will not suit me, then I can leave at any moment. I am completely free, and attractive enough to get to itself a dozen - another fan, if the need arises."
If you can not live without this man, and he without you - can (and can be very well may), then he will manage the situation, not you. As a result, it is he will realize their wishes, and not you. Need to feel free and act accordingly.
Create the ground for proposals hands and hearts
Answer the following questions:
Both of you well when you are together?
You tell each other about everything?
Do you have common interests, hobbies?
You harmony in bed?
He thinks you best friend?
Do you have general plans for the future?
If the answer to all questions is yes, then we can make plans to start a family, including civil marriage.
If not, then on that still need to work to develop relations in this direction.
Next steps
If you were able to successfully fulfill all three conditions, then the man is ready to make a family. He is well with you, he values your relationship, he plans to later life with you. The maximum that remains to be done - it is a little push. And how to do it - tells intuition (and if not prompt, you can read the popular literature for women, it describes a lot of ways).
P.S. How important is the stamp in the passport?
In modern law in our country, civil marriage, that is, cohabitation and common household, so the same laws as formalized. At its dissolution woman, like man, may claim and the division of property, and children. Therefore, to insist on registration relationship in the registry office is not always the best choice.
Usually, it's still not in the die, and in self-doubt, or in your partner. In this case, better to turn to a psychologist for individual counseling (and one can, but better with a man).
Sunday, November 22, 2009
12 characters speak about treason favorite
Although adultery, as well as to tango, needs two people and women, frankly, are not innocent lambs who were lured to cleverly nets, often it is men who tend to polygamy.
A matter of trust - one of the most important in the relationship. At the moment when you realize that you change, you feel as if a person suddenly flew basketball ball. It is very painful. But suddenly you're wrong? And it is actually quite different? How can I check?
There are some obvious signs that he had started an affair. And, if clearly and dispassionately analyze the behavior of his favorite and only then discover they will be fairly simple. So:
1. He was cautious, nervous, if your hand gets his mobile phone;
2. He was delayed at work, but it can not and will not clearly explain what exactly he was there so late deals;
3. He suddenly began to show increased interest in the new perfume and scents;
4. He abruptly began to worry about how it looks. Spend more time at the mirror, a genuine interest in clothes, is slipped up in the gym - all in order to get a better look;
5. It controls the order in the car. If a family has children - removes the first opportunity a child seat and all traces of the baby in the cabin;
6. He "forgets" to wear a wedding ring;
7. He wondered about the strange calls in the apartment. When you come up - in the tube could only hear short beeps;
8. He becomes unusually solicitous (can give flowers and gifts - and just like that, without apparent reason). In general, there is a sign of guilt;
9. He constantly receives orders from superiors to go somewhere, including a trip to another city;
10. His clothes from time to time women's perfume smells. And this is not your perfume;
11. His body appeared suspicious traces, and he gives the country an explanation about their origin. And you just know that this is not your handiwork;
12. He behaves differently in bed. Options may be several: a strong sexual appetite increased, or, conversely, went down to nothing, or it is hard to test new technology offers.
From time to time our sense of confidence is being tested, but to determine whether or not you change, it is very difficult. Say what you like, but judging from the statistics, more than half of all men at least once, but change. However, this circumstance suggests that there are millions of men who have never changed and did not want to do this in the future.
But what if you are clear indications that from you have something to hide, and suggest themselves to the eye? One characteristic of our entire list, of course, enough to start to worry. However, if the man's behavior corresponds to 5 or 6 of them ... Well, time to reflect and find out eventually that hide from you! The main thing - do not ignore this problem and hope that all will end by itself. At stake - your future and credibility of the man who was near.
Psychologists believe that men are changing, because:
A) looking for a new experience in sex
B) want more sex
B) looking for diversity in sex
In women, the list of reasons for the betrayal of several diverse, but that does not mean that cheating men is simple and easy to understand. Studies have shown that in the first place the new link on the side of the mean for men to "new" sex. But often this is a way to be "more flexible" in relations with a steady partner, and an attempt to re-experience the feeling of youth, and sometimes an escape from boring unsuccessful marriage.
For some men, the novels on the side - an opportunity to distance himself from his permanent partner, a certain way to avoid "excessive" proximity. Not sinking too deeply into the feelings and avoiding a full-fledged emotional closeness, they believe that retain their freedom. "Dependence" scares them. This type of men is also very avoids conflict.
There are men who they go to the winds, becoming older. Fear of age - that's what makes them change. They understand that they will never become young and fresh and an affair with someone "new and young" gives them a sense of his own youth. Though not for long.
Biologists believe that the blame ancient instincts. But, judging by the fact that more women are also changing, we can assume that before they stopped only public opinion.
Infidelity are different. This may be just one night, and may last for years. But they are destructive to the marriage. Although treason itself does not mean that everything has come to an end and it's time to put the point in relations, the causes of this event often need to look for it in the family. Many women believe that their rival has to be younger, more attractive and better than they. But not always it turns out to be true. If an existing alliance of roads you - draw conclusions and try to save him.
A matter of trust - one of the most important in the relationship. At the moment when you realize that you change, you feel as if a person suddenly flew basketball ball. It is very painful. But suddenly you're wrong? And it is actually quite different? How can I check?
There are some obvious signs that he had started an affair. And, if clearly and dispassionately analyze the behavior of his favorite and only then discover they will be fairly simple. So:
1. He was cautious, nervous, if your hand gets his mobile phone;
2. He was delayed at work, but it can not and will not clearly explain what exactly he was there so late deals;
3. He suddenly began to show increased interest in the new perfume and scents;
4. He abruptly began to worry about how it looks. Spend more time at the mirror, a genuine interest in clothes, is slipped up in the gym - all in order to get a better look;
5. It controls the order in the car. If a family has children - removes the first opportunity a child seat and all traces of the baby in the cabin;
6. He "forgets" to wear a wedding ring;
7. He wondered about the strange calls in the apartment. When you come up - in the tube could only hear short beeps;
8. He becomes unusually solicitous (can give flowers and gifts - and just like that, without apparent reason). In general, there is a sign of guilt;
9. He constantly receives orders from superiors to go somewhere, including a trip to another city;
10. His clothes from time to time women's perfume smells. And this is not your perfume;
11. His body appeared suspicious traces, and he gives the country an explanation about their origin. And you just know that this is not your handiwork;
12. He behaves differently in bed. Options may be several: a strong sexual appetite increased, or, conversely, went down to nothing, or it is hard to test new technology offers.
From time to time our sense of confidence is being tested, but to determine whether or not you change, it is very difficult. Say what you like, but judging from the statistics, more than half of all men at least once, but change. However, this circumstance suggests that there are millions of men who have never changed and did not want to do this in the future.
But what if you are clear indications that from you have something to hide, and suggest themselves to the eye? One characteristic of our entire list, of course, enough to start to worry. However, if the man's behavior corresponds to 5 or 6 of them ... Well, time to reflect and find out eventually that hide from you! The main thing - do not ignore this problem and hope that all will end by itself. At stake - your future and credibility of the man who was near.
Psychologists believe that men are changing, because:
A) looking for a new experience in sex
B) want more sex
B) looking for diversity in sex
In women, the list of reasons for the betrayal of several diverse, but that does not mean that cheating men is simple and easy to understand. Studies have shown that in the first place the new link on the side of the mean for men to "new" sex. But often this is a way to be "more flexible" in relations with a steady partner, and an attempt to re-experience the feeling of youth, and sometimes an escape from boring unsuccessful marriage.
For some men, the novels on the side - an opportunity to distance himself from his permanent partner, a certain way to avoid "excessive" proximity. Not sinking too deeply into the feelings and avoiding a full-fledged emotional closeness, they believe that retain their freedom. "Dependence" scares them. This type of men is also very avoids conflict.
There are men who they go to the winds, becoming older. Fear of age - that's what makes them change. They understand that they will never become young and fresh and an affair with someone "new and young" gives them a sense of his own youth. Though not for long.
Biologists believe that the blame ancient instincts. But, judging by the fact that more women are also changing, we can assume that before they stopped only public opinion.
Infidelity are different. This may be just one night, and may last for years. But they are destructive to the marriage. Although treason itself does not mean that everything has come to an end and it's time to put the point in relations, the causes of this event often need to look for it in the family. Many women believe that their rival has to be younger, more attractive and better than they. But not always it turns out to be true. If an existing alliance of roads you - draw conclusions and try to save him.
18 ways to reach the top sex
Finally, call a few sexual tricks that you can use this evening to start his way to the top of sex. I wish you luck and love.
1. Go along and buy some cool magazines and sex videos. Take them to the bedroom. Rate each of them and see what excites you stronger than others.
2. Undress and slowly, one by one, body massage each other, using slightly aromatizi-ried oil. Pay special attention to the genitals partner.
3. Slowly masturbate together for three minutes, and then help each other to masturbate for three minutes, then again themselves, and so watch carefully how your partner makes me happy and learn.
4. Role between oral sex (for three minutes, then change). Give your partner what you like oral pleasure more than anything.
5. Buy together a few sex toys - at least two each. Use them in sex and see what experience they deliver to you.
6. Share their fantasies, play the ones that you attract and excite.
7. Lie down beside and train their "sex muscles" as much as possible and rhythmically. Women may try to push the vibrator out of the vagina, then insert it again, or to ask about this partner.
8. Put the other erotic clothing, in which you wish to see your partner.
9. Serve in the mornings each other in turn. All morning the servant should remain naked and ensure that all sexual and other services to his master or mistress. No failures!
10. Masturbate together as quickly as possible, to orgasm. Then see if you can bring each other orgasm even faster.
11. Take tonight, love anywhere, except the bedroom.
12. Tonight, take a bath together and carefully wash each other, wash your partner's hair, and then sbreyte each other pubic hair.
13. Think genitals to each other through the flowing water and caress their toes.
14. Make love as slowly as possible. You have eternity ahead.
15. Make your partner something sexual, of what you have never done before (even if you can never repeat it). How about an easy drubbing? Polite submissiveness? Try to tolerate something that would not have tolerated earlier.
16. Begin sexual diaries - in solitary confinement - and the end of the honeymoon compare records. Remember to be absolutely honest, notes and successes and defeats.
17. Decide for yourself never hide from your partner's erotic fantasies.
18. Decide that you and your partner will fully use their sexual repertoire, and you'll reach the top sex whenever love one another.
1. Go along and buy some cool magazines and sex videos. Take them to the bedroom. Rate each of them and see what excites you stronger than others.
2. Undress and slowly, one by one, body massage each other, using slightly aromatizi-ried oil. Pay special attention to the genitals partner.
3. Slowly masturbate together for three minutes, and then help each other to masturbate for three minutes, then again themselves, and so watch carefully how your partner makes me happy and learn.
4. Role between oral sex (for three minutes, then change). Give your partner what you like oral pleasure more than anything.
5. Buy together a few sex toys - at least two each. Use them in sex and see what experience they deliver to you.
6. Share their fantasies, play the ones that you attract and excite.
7. Lie down beside and train their "sex muscles" as much as possible and rhythmically. Women may try to push the vibrator out of the vagina, then insert it again, or to ask about this partner.
8. Put the other erotic clothing, in which you wish to see your partner.
9. Serve in the mornings each other in turn. All morning the servant should remain naked and ensure that all sexual and other services to his master or mistress. No failures!
10. Masturbate together as quickly as possible, to orgasm. Then see if you can bring each other orgasm even faster.
11. Take tonight, love anywhere, except the bedroom.
12. Tonight, take a bath together and carefully wash each other, wash your partner's hair, and then sbreyte each other pubic hair.
13. Think genitals to each other through the flowing water and caress their toes.
14. Make love as slowly as possible. You have eternity ahead.
15. Make your partner something sexual, of what you have never done before (even if you can never repeat it). How about an easy drubbing? Polite submissiveness? Try to tolerate something that would not have tolerated earlier.
16. Begin sexual diaries - in solitary confinement - and the end of the honeymoon compare records. Remember to be absolutely honest, notes and successes and defeats.
17. Decide for yourself never hide from your partner's erotic fantasies.
18. Decide that you and your partner will fully use their sexual repertoire, and you'll reach the top sex whenever love one another.
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